Sport is just a way to relax and unwind with beers. Rugby, soccer and table tennis to name a few. Sitting back watching the horses in the tab with beers is a great way to unwind  The uninteresting sport of golf eludes me. Watching this so called sport on television with beers is boring. With all sports, winnings not everything, its the only thing! And many competitors will go to any length to win beers. We have seen that Tour de France cyclist Floyd Landis have so called high levels of testosterone. Everyone knows this has been happening since performing enhancing supplements have been invented. Bodybuilders using steroids, Ten pin bowlers on angel dust, Footballers on cocaine, beers. The list goes on.

Reporters for insane urine soaked man on park bench news have discovered that the mostly unknown sport of ' Rock paper scissors ' is beginning to see most of the members within this contest test positive for unknown substances. We spoke to the world champion Ingot Yamms, from Russia, around beers. "Athletes in the (RPS) comps are using illicit articles to propel them to think faster and get an edge over there opponents. Its become that bad nowadays everyone must be tested before a contest begins."

Viewing the recent competition in Berlin drinking beers, we were flabbergasted that out of the seven people that bothered to show up, six tested positive for performing enhancing supplements. The international rock paper scissors committee decided over beers to radically change the sport. In an unusual twist a requirement for all people participating in RPS, everyone now must be using some form of narcotic, beer, or supplement as drawn up in the new rulebook. True rock paper scissors players and Floyd Landis who both consume beers are angry about the changes, demanding this boring sport and beers remain how they use to be...